The Nod, the neck-jerk, and the wobble

“Mumbai mein aapka swagath hai” (Welcome to Mumbai), came the announcement. I was so ready to get off the plane and go home. My body was trying to figure which time zone I was in, the lower half was in the sleep zone the upper half was travelling. After a 16 hour flight, maybe I should’ve walked upside down to enable the travelling half to do its job.

As we stepped off the airplane, we saw passengers racing to get ahead of one another to get in line for immigration. The nudging, pushing, elbowing, cutting-in had already started just setting the mood for Mumbai (Bombay). This milieu is highly visible when driving on Mumbai roads. It also translates to other walks of life- includes catching/saving seats, putting cabin luggage in the overhead rack of an airplane, or standing in line for anything (NOTE: People will stand in line because they see a line of people standing).

I have been out of India for the last 16 years and it is rare to see Bombay mannerisms around me. I make it a point to visit Bombay on a frequent basis to get a booster shot of “Aamchi Mumbai” to keep the Mumbai genes alive.
As we hail a cab to go home, I began to notice the mannerisms and etiquette of people around me. The cabbie points at us, gives us the neck jerk and says he will go with the negotiated fare, yet will be open for tips and extras. That translates to – “I will take you through roads with less potholes and pipeline breaks and water flooding and less bumps if you can give me an extra Rs.200.”
We agreed. I was in no mood to argue for $4.

In the morning, mom and I decided to take a local temple tour. As we stepped out of the building the gurkha (watchman) greets us with a neck-jerk and Namaste. We started to see a lot of the local friends, I met Mrs. Tipnis my favorite Marathi teacher, “Kashi ahes Janaki, Aai barobar Kadhi aales? ”.(How are you? When did you come?). Known faces gathered around us, everyone wanted to talk and ask questions at the same time. Mom was doing the talking, I stood there smiling and shaking hands, giving hugs or saying a Namaste. The affection and warmth just flowed, in spite of me seeing them after quite a few years.
I noticed that the neck jerk greeting was very common. It meant, “Hey pal, Howz it goin’?”  Everyone spoke with hands tightly folded, or had hands on their hips, or pointed their finger at someone while talking, and the decibels of the chatter were loud enough to crack the stemware in my house.

Hey, but this is Mumbai …..You’ve got to let loose, laugh it and live it! Being uptight is just not the way to enjoy Mumbai!
After taking many courses on communication, empowering teams and people building workshops, I noticed that things that we noted down as “DONTs” were “DOs” in Mumbai.  So when someone gave me the neck-jerk, I returned that with a smile and nod. I could see bewildered, confused looks ! Hmmm… time to let loose……


I could not believe that even while boarding a local flight to Mangalore with confirmed seating, there was nudging, pushing, elbowing, and cutting-in!

At Mangalore, I noted that the security guard gave all passengers the head wobble, I returned with a nod and smile.

As I drove through Mangalore into Kerala, I saw that the neck-jerk had vanished and now the greeting was the head wobble. The drive was so scenic, truly gave a taste of Incredible India!

In Kerala, I had the opportunity of meeting a lot of extended family. Everyone coming into the house gave me the head wobble to varying degrees of oscillation.
Who hasn’t heard of the pendulum?

A small head wobble, meant, ”Hello. I don’t know you much.” A medium wobble,”Hi, I’ve heard about you”. A vigorous oscillation meant,” Aha, so this is who you are! Mm Hmm…, I know you more than you think I do”
In Malayalam,”Edi, Evedanna vannu? Ennike ninne ariyam edi.”
I soon learned that a longer period of oscillation of the head wobble equated to the fact that the person has heard and knows about you much more than you think you know about you! You would think these guys have mastered Stephen Coveys book on -7 Habits of highly effective people. 

Talking on the phone in Kerala was an intriguing phenomenon. When a call came locally, the person receiving the call spoke at normal decibels, as soon as he was told that the call came outside of Kerala, his sound decibel increased 3-fold. When the same person received an international call, his conversation could be heard across the entire street. (Note: The incoming call clarity for all three calls was the same.) Does the location’s physical distance have anything to do with it? Go figure …

Besides mingling with the local crowd, it was time to “Yenjoy Gawds Oon Coundry” as a mallu(malayalee) will say or enjoy “Gods Own Country” as is the slogan for the state of Kerala.

After a 2 day whirlwind trip to Kerala, I was back in Mumbai for the last leg of my vacation. It was interesting that my time with family was being measured in hours rather than days.

In the few hours I had left I decided to check out local attractions. For transportation, it was a tossup between the autorickshaw and the local train. For fear of dear life, I decided to take the rickshaw. My alter ego said, ”chicken!”. (Either way for the faint hearted make sure you have life insurance coverage.)

Being in Mumbai, I took every opportunity to eat out. At restaurants people ate with hands on the table, licked off fingers, and didn’t mind dusting off crumbs on their pants, or others pants! I even saw someone sneeze and blow on their neighbors shirts in a crowded bus! Live, laugh, let loose…
No wonder Bombay has been called the “Maximum City”.

I had received my dose of Mumbai Dhamaka, and it was time to go home!
Bringing with me memories, until my next “Aamchi Mumbai” booster!